Mid-week Links for your viewing pleasure:

• bbq and foot massage
  
• nerd thrashes up cardboard boxes w/ homemade claws
• the "cougar" is a crappy mom, are you at all surprised?
• maybe you shouldn't buy that
• Lions solidify linebacker core
• will Brett Favre trade in his wranglers for a Vikings uniform?
• the dork yearbook
• redwings got snubbed last night

play him off keyboard cat...

winding down my life at MSU

First off I must apologize for going MIA the past few weeks. The majority of my time lately has been spent finishing up the remainder of my classes before graduation. I actually have my last final at 12:45 today, so wish me luck. Here is a link to the online advertising portfolio I put together for one of my classes...

I've been struggling to come up with material for the blog seeing as I've been incredibly busy as of late. Therefore I will refrain from getting into detail and merely provide you with these photos from lolcats.com hahaha What makes these funny is the blatant disregard for usage of the English language.

Top 10 favorite Nykerk family traditions

By popular demand I chose to write a little more this time. Below I have assembled a list of top 10 Nykerk family traditions. I realize I may have left some out but these are just a few that popped into my head.

10. Sucker tree
The only thing that could have made the sucker tree any better is if it was associated with a carney game. Upon pulling the sucker with a painted stick you win a prize. Knowing grandma everyone would probably be a winner.

9.Punch
I could go one for days about specific food/drink items on the list such as, candied apples, turkey on buns, ice cream and strawberries, meatballs, etc. One of my favorite Christmas staples is the punch. It’s a showdown between the sherbet recipe and the raspberry one. I’ll give the edge to the sherbet one based on of course tradition. I’m confident that drinking a glass of either will give you a nervous twitch from all the sugar, but sometimes you just have to push through the pain.

8.Summertime at the beach
The awesomeness of this tradition can be summed up with a number, that number being 11. It represents the 11 secret herbs and spices which season none other than Colonel Sanders legacy that is Kentucky Fried Chicken. Of course tumbling down the hill at Tunnel Park and replacing the taste of KFC with sand is great too.

7. Wearing corny sweaters to holiday events
Over the past three Christmas seasons I’ve gone out of my way to scavenge the women’s section of Goodwill for the ultimate in corny holiday attire. Lansing has a location which is accurately dubbed the Goodwill Emporium, needless to say it’s got some gems. I became rather excited when a formal competition was announced this past Christmas. My bubble definitely burst upon concluding that Keith and I were the only participants, well you’ve all got 9 months to step up your game in ’09. Let it be known, if you’re arms aren’t burnt out from flipping through racks of clothes after venturing to a 2nd hand store, you have failed.

6.Girls v. Guys Pictionary
The old school Nykerk brothers are priceless when it comes to this competition. While their livelihood is a form of art and they can both paint, carve wood, etc. not one ounce of this talent translates to Pictionary. There’s one reason for this oddity……pressure. Folding under pressure is an understatement, flip over an hourglass next to either one of them and they’re bound to have a coronary. Which reminds me of the Portland airport fiasco, but we won’t go into that.

5.Bowling on thanksgiving
It’s a shame that so few Nykerks participate in this tradition, although understanding, given the older patron’s dependence on naps. The bowling competition has become rather stiff ever since Big Jim went to the “league.” So if you ever plan on joining in on the fun, bring the A game. Oh and for the record, bowling shoe rental is a scam and I demand reparation.

4.Hunting for Easter baskets
here’s a throwback. I enjoy checking out old photos of this Easter tradition. It’s cool to see how things have changed since the late 80’s. The hideous fashions really stand out in the pics along with the size of our pine trees (lack there of). No one is too old to enjoy candy, so I don’t understand why this event was disbanded. Maybe it’s for the best on account of the diabetes.

3.Christmas gift exchange
While a copious number of gifts throughout the years may have been duds, it’s all about the spirit of giving. Some recent highlights include Bill receiving a fashion t and necklace, as well as Big Jim choosing his own binoculars, after spending 1/3 of the party going home to fetch them.

2.Christmas bingo
There has been a number of memorable white elephant gifts unwrapped during bingo over the years. A few classics include: the bass, toilet paper, the poo pen, the painting, etc. Every year you can plan on Chad attempting to bend the rules by playing 3+ cards; as well as my mother proclaiming that “the tumor in benign.” I have come to ponder why there are always strictly girls prizes left 2/3 way through the game; I guess the guys are gonna have to start adding prizes to the pot, or learn to love lotion and candles.

1.Grandma's cookies/caramels
Step aside Mrs. Fields, these delectable one bite cookies are the perfect mix between holiday flair as well as sweet and savory goodness. They’re the only cookies I could eat double digit quantities of without feeling bad about myself. The caramels aren’t bad either. Mad respect to Brenda and Jenny for keeping this one alive.

Honorable mentions: Chad leaving events prematurely, Aunt Carol fitting 37 presents into a box with 6 square feet of space, the Hamburgers arriving fashionably late (those spontaneous cow blockades will really throw a monkey wrench in your plans).

the big dance

The Spartans tip off against the Kansas Jayhawks tonight at 9:37 p.m. I predict a big game out of Ramar Morgan, he had 13 points and 8 rebounds in State's convincing 75-62 win over Kansas in January. As far as the outcome is concerned, Kansas will not be defeding their title in '09 as they will be knocked off by MSU tonight. Final score 78-70. Here's a highlight reel of a little of what's to come...

FML

Often when I have some downtime, I swing by the site FML to burn a few minutes. Basically the premise of the site is that those who have experienced an unfortunate event, post the story for everyone else's entertainment. So if you're in the mood to laugh about others' misfortunes check it out. Here are a few samples:

- Today, I went to the gym with two of my friends expecting to pay a guest fee but the cute guy working at the front desk let me in for free. On the way out after working out I started to flirt with him and he said "Don't flatter yourself, I just let you in because I'm lazy." FML

- Today, I went to have dessert with my boyfriend. We ordered some Jello. I said that I loved Jello because it is so fun and jiggly. My boyfriend said, "Like you. Except the fun part". FML

- Today, our school had tryouts for chorus. Everybody sang a snippet of the song together until the teacher stopped us, saying it sounded awful. He singled me out and told me to sing alone. After I sang the part, he said, "Son, your gift to God will be silence." FML

- Today, my parents said that they bought me a car. I had been begging for one for a year and they always said that I would have to pay for it myself. I got really excited and went to the garage to see my new ride. It was a Hot Wheels car with a note saying "save your money". FML

- Today, my parents told me they were going out for dinner tonight. I jokingly responded "Sweet! I am totally having a keg party then!" My dad responded "Keg parties are only for kids who have friends." He was serious. FML

- Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of only two weeks. As we were dancing, another woman grabbed my ass from behind me and squeezed. I yelped and turned around to see my mother as the culprit. My girlfriend punched her. I found out my mother is a Cougar and my girl has a mean right hook. FML

- Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to Itunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

- Today, a co-worker and I walked out of our office at the same time. He got in his car, which was parked right out front. I asked him what I had to do to get a sweet parking spot like that. He proceeded to roll up his pant leg and show me his prosthesis. He was in the handicapped spot. FML

- Today, a kid I coach on a regular basis was talking to me about what I did outside of work. After we were done with the conversation, she told me with a straight face that I need to get a life and get a boyfriend. She's 10. And she's right. FML

- Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

Lions new logo and uniforms

The lions made some slight alterations to their logo design and jerseys. The lion logo aka "Bubbles" is far more ferocious looking than in years past....










http://www.prideofdetroit.com

order in the court!

So apparently Allen Iverson lost an appeal yesterday and was forced to pay $260,000 in damages to a man named Marlin Godfrey. The incident occurred back in 2005 when Godfrey refused to vacate the VIP section of a club. Iverson's bodyguard proceeded to smash his face in with a bottle as well as kick and punch him mercilessly. In the end Godfrey suffered a concussion, a burst blood vessel in his eye, a torn rotator cuff, cuts and bruises, a ruptured eardrum, as well as emotional injuries. Iverson stood idly by watching the events unfold and according to the court was therefore liable.

This news story got me thinking of all the ways in which people aquire funds via lawsuits. While Godfrey seemed to have a fairly convincing case, I found a list of some of the most ridiculous suits of all time: top 12.

whats up?

I realize that I have blatantly disregarded my blog over the past few days. I apologize, the only excuse I have is that I've been swamped with the projects I'm working on. I was asked to design two t-shirts for my frats upcoming Derby Days fundraiser. In addition I've been busy creating promotional material for my ADV 486 class. Here's a few examples of the work...

Back in action

-I would have posted sooner, but I had a big exam I had been studying for. I can gladly say that I gave it the business, 46/50...

-On our return trip from Florida one particular billboard caught my attention, it read: Big Jim's Boobie Bungalo. Now I realize how the old man manages to put us through college, his lucrative "investments".

-I was in a rush to purchase groceries yesterday due to a group meeting I had scheduled. So I grabbed one of Meijer's mini carts for maximum maneuverability and went about my business. Seeing as I purchased mainly produce I avoided the self-checkout lanes, in order to bypass inputting so many numbers. I found a standard line with two other patrons waiting to be checked out, one being an elderly woman. The second I whipped my mini-cart around the corner to enter the lane the old lady ripped a hiroshima-esque fart. Needless to say the wheels on my cart never came to a complete stop as I redirected to an alternative lane. At this point I was willing to sacrifice time for comfort. The worst part about it was her blatant disregard for the event's occurrence. One perk was the entertainment I received when an unsuspecting shopper unknowingly entered to "blast zone." She gave that bitter beer face look as if she tasted the fart. I was surprised she could smell it over the aroma of the old lady's perfume: kitty litter splashed with a hint of moth ball. (Sorry I know this blurb was insensitive and gross but I'm bored and have nothing to write about)

-Facebook has a new layout in which they blatantly knock-off the concept of Twitter. Twitter is "a service for friends, family, and co–workers to communicate and stay connected through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing?" Facebook has incorporated this into their homepage, solely for the purpose of ad revenue. Oh well that site is basically dead to me by now.

-So the NCAA tournament starts today and I'm beginning to lose track of all the brackets I've filled out. Jeff made one particular group in which he as well as Dave, Chad and I will vie for $50 in cash and prizes, ooooh exciting. Look for MSU as they match up first round Friday at 9:50 p.m. vs. Robert Morris, which should be a curbstomping.

-I applied for a job working for Nielsen which is a market research company. The job entails working from home analyzing radio advertisements. We'll see how this pans out, they haven't responded as of yet.

-I saw the movie Watchmen last night and was thoroughly impressed, I will let my boy Sexman give you the scoop:

Flo-Rida

So as you may or may not know I'm leaving for spring break tomorrow. Therefore I will be going MIA as far as the blog is concerned (no thanks to the hooligan who gripped my laptop). Don't worry, by no means do I intend on being featured in the next episode of Cops: Panama City Beach Patrol.

Classic Viral Videos

Below are a few of my favorite internet clips of all time. While these clips are dated, they never cease to amaze.

typography

I am currently designing an online portfolio for my ADV 354 Interactive design class. One of the requirements is an about me page, opposed to just typing a boring rant about myself, I chose to experiment with some different typographies and organize them in interesting ways.

Kickin it Old Skool

Homer Simpson dreams of the day donuts fall from the sky; I imagine the day cereal rains down from above, as if it were a contemporary form of manna. It’s no secret that I am infatuated with the sugary goodness cereal has to offer. In my mind a special part of the food pyramid should be sectioned off for this staple food source. Alright you get the just of it, I digress.

The news I have to offer is that General Mills is releasing retro cereal boxes. The boxes will be sold strictly at Target retailers; the promotion will also include t-shirts, available on-line for five proof-of-purchase labels. I assume they are running the promo to encourage at the very least a short term spike in sales. While this may be a clever way to push their product, General Mills is potentially sacrificing brand equity. Doing so by making the packaging so similar to cheap imitators and store brands. Some experts feel that during these economic times consumers seek comfort and nostalgic packaging is one way to provide it.

I am curious to see whether or not this nostalgic packaging promotion becomes any sort of a trend. Perhaps instead they should revive some old cereals like Brenda’s Kaboom....

Yes, spring training baseball is under way

The Tigers are merely a week into spring training, yet things seem to be falling apart in regards to their starting rotation. Bonderman is currently hopped up on meds due to soreness in his pitching elbow. He will be rested for two or three days in order to hopefully get back on track. Of course this is after missing his Saturday start due to stiffness in the arm.

Meanwhile the D-Train has re-adjusted his delivery in order to get himself back on track. He nixed most of the herky jerky movement he showcased in the past, in exchange for greater control. In doing so, he is sacrificing a degree of deception which made him such a successful pitcher in the past. His high leg kick is all that remains of the technique which won him 22 games in '05. A scout described him as "tentative" and "so easy to hit" during his outing last Friday. He failed to pull himself together all of last season and this last ditch effort is currently looking very bleak.

Miner, who is also in competition for a spot in the rotation get shelled during his first start. I see Leyland handing him the mop because he's bound for clean-up duty. Overall the Tiger's have me worried from the get go; are they bound for another disappointing season? Doubtful, luckily I have a feeling they're playoff bound in '09 for the following reasons regardless of these early pitching woes:

• Miguel Cabrera, nuff said
• Verlander is too talented to have another lackluster year (I mean come on the boy has already pitched a no hitter and started an all star game in his career)
  
• 20-20-20 man Curtis Granderson, and on a side note the boy's got a blog on espn
• Edwin Jackson is a promising young talent, worth the price Detroit paid for him (Matt Joyce)
• Brandon Lyon replaces Todd Jones, Ol Todd has taken several years off my life, luckily the bleeding can finally stop
• Gary Sheffield is healthy and determined, according to scouts he's swinging a good bat and is predicted to be a comeback player of the year candidate, I predict he hits his 500th on opening day
• Detroit doesn't play in the Al East
• The infield is far superior to 08's defensively, therefore the pitching staff will be alleviated of added pressure caused by errors

let's just hope Jimmy Leyland can ward off lung cancer long enough to lead Detroit into the playoffs

video link

Excessive ping pong celebration, take a gander at the scoreboard near the end of the video.

Top 5 in '08

After discovering the goose attack video, I started recalling some of the classic animal related videos I've stumbled across. Therefore I bring you the top youtube animal videos of 2008:
#5: (click) infestation (click)
#4: 8 lives remain

rounding out the top 3, silly sam's dog capone
(not really)
#2: nic cage in a bear suit is animal enough for the list
the #1 stunna

woot

I don't know if you've ever heard of woot.com, but it's an online shopping site which I really enjoy. The deal is that they offer only one bargain a day until it's sold out or the clock strikes midnight. There are actually two sister sites as well: shirt woot and wine woot. Shirt designs are decided through competition, most of the entrys are rather nerdy but every now and then you run across a good one. Even if you don't plan on making any purchases in the near future it's still fun to see what woot will post next, I check it as if it were a daily ritual.

Today they're offering indoor cordless bugzappers for $17.99, something no family should go without some might say...
-oh and look out for "two for Tuesday" as well as "woot offs"

Will the Pistons make the playoffs?

So the Detroit Pistons are below .500 and are riding a 7 game losing streak. Is it fair to deem the AI experiment a failure? let's contemplate why they suck:
-they couldn't make a three to save their lives
-they lack any form of leadership in the locker room, they have no guy they can consistently look too for guidance
-winning at home should come fairly easy for any good team, the Pistons act as if the Palace is the last place they want to play
-their winning teams were built on defense, that defensive mindset is MIA
-their roster includes a player who is known as the biggest lottery bust of all time, there is even a site dedicated to his abysmal play
-they show zero effort
-they've gone 5-14 since Richard Hamilton has returned from his injury, subtraction by addition?

.....at least they free up salary cap space at the end of the season via Sheed and AI's contracts. Let's chalk this transitional season of theirs up as a loss. BDL rankings list the Pistons 19th overall just edging the Knicks, that's disgraceful. If they squeak into the playoffs they will surely lose in the first round.

Iverson should have never nixed the cornrows:

Goose attack

This goose attack video reminds me of my days working at good old Dutch Village. Every morning I was given the task of refilling the animal's feeders and I could always depend on being assaulted by the disgruntled swan. Those birds are pesky.

Here's one for all the Price is Right connoisseurs out there, you may remember this classic pricing game.

Let the games begin

Well, a professor encouraged me to experiment online with a blog, so I thought I'd give it a shot. It should be a great way to improve my writing skills while staying up on times. I must also admit, I'm quite inspired by all of the dilligent Nykerks for informing the family of their affairs/antics via the "blogmosphere." (Actually I'm writing truly out of spite, how could I stand idley by while my mother, who learned to type on a typewriter mind you, has a blog up and running). Well it's up, running really isn't the proper nomenclature given her .75 posts per week. Here's a list of what's to come on The Flying Hollander:

• sports banter with an emphasis on the Tigers, Spartans and Lions (for as long as they're the Detroit Lions and not the LA Lions)
• youtube clips to the n^th degree
• advertising news
  
• a pic here and there
• links to exciting new sites that "old" people would otherwise stumble across years after they've already become irrelevant (like facebook for example)
• updates in regards to my lack of a job, give me a break the competition is stiff: (warning explicit language) http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/942873935.html
• anything exciting or amusing happening in my life
  
• my new address so Big Jim can forward me all my bills.....oh wait nevermind
  
• anything else I deem worthy